Friday, June 12, 2009

Long Duck Dong

Do you remember Long Duck Dong from Sixteen Candles? At the BYU writing conference, I shared a poignant experience that I once had with the aforementioned superstar. It is now that I would like to take the time to share it with you (my one faithful reader).
Another delay? Are you kidding me? I really just wanted to get home, as I was sure all the other passengers milling around LAX did also. I pulled out my walkman, slid on the satellite sized earphones and then shoved in my coolest new tape: Lighter Shade of Brown. (Note: If you are unfamiliar with this group that's because they are a one hit wonder...and by one hit, I mean probably only in Utah. I dunno...Goggle them.)

I rocked to the bassy beat as I looked around the terminal. Right across the row from me sat Long Duck Dong. No way.

"Long Duck Dong!" I jumped out of my seat and ripped the fatty-arse-ear phones off my head.

He smiled.

I shivered...and not just because it was cold in the terminal.

"You know, Long Duck Dong is not my real name," he said. Then relaxing back in his chair, he pulled out the LA times.

"Sure, whatever," I replied and then asked him a slew of questions. The flight delay gave us time to talk for nearly an hour more. Glorious. I asked him all the Sixteen Candle questions I could think of, and I even quoted my most favorite lines from the movie. I knew he must have been impressed by my wittiness and clear memory. Oh, wonderful flight delays. When they finally called for boarding, my new BFF and I walked to the gate.

"So," I said, now just standing inches from him. "Do you want to come over for dinner?"

Long Duck Dong tilted head and said, "I am sorry, but, we are not as good of friends as you think we are."

Hmm, How did I read that one wrong? Awkward. "Oh, ok. Maybe some other time." I scurried onto the plane and tried not to bother my Ex-new-BFF for the remaining flight.


Marcie said...

I've never heard that one from you! SO funny. Sorry that Long Duck Dong turned you down, though. What a nerd!

A. said...

All I can say is, only you Erin. Only you.


renae said...




i can totally see alllllll of this playing out in my mind. ha! hilarious!

Melony said...

:) You rock Erin!

Sara said...

Oh Erin, you are such a crack up. I seriously hope to see this line in print (possibly in multiple books) very soon! :-)

Rach said...

when did this happen? hahahahhahahah we all love long duck dong!

Janette Rallison said...

But we are as good of friends as you think we are . . .

i'm erin. said...

hooray Janette! You know, that as soon as I buy a house next to you that WE WILL BE friends forever..muah ha ha ha ha ha

aisyahputrisetiawan said...

Banned complain !! Complaining only causes life and mind become more severe. Enjoy the rhythm of the problems faced. No matter ga life, not a problem not learn, so enjoy it :)

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