Tuesday, November 30, 2010

"A serious load of crap," I said. "That stinks," he said.

Today I came home
and found not one, not two, not three, or four,
but FIVE piles of Dog doo just beyond the front door.
Poop, I say,
brown logs of non-floating crap,
My living room is the scene of a dog deposit attack.

What's this, you ask.
How can that be?
It can and it was accompanied by pee.
Pee, I say
in the form of ghastly-yellow-green
stain on the carpet beside my Christmas tree.

What beast, you ask, left the foul present for me?
A brute, a bear,
my black dog is guilty
That Damn Dog, I say.
Devil of a Lab,
I scolded him good and threw him out back.

And how did I fix this disaster more atrocious than none?
I realized my sweet hubby
was on his way home.
Poop, I said,
when he walked in the door.
Holy *)@# he said, and walked downstairs and found more.

Moral of the story,
is don't come home for lunch,
when your big black dog
has just crapped out a mountain of junk.

9 SPLURTS:

Kami said...

That's awesome!

You're quite the poet my friend...even if it is about poo. :)

Just SO said...

Ack!!! I probably would have said what Mark said.

Kristiner said...

YUCK! I'd kill the dog.

Jo said...

I do hope someone ELSE is dogsitting for you this weekend when we're kidsitting for you. I do NOT wat THAT in MY house!

Kahilau said...

That's nasty! And Mark is a gem. Did he clean it all up? That's Amazing!

Ella said...

Good luck selling the house now!! JK

Shari said...

Ew. That is one reason my husband will not allow animals in the house, unless it is in the form of a reptile. I know. Ugh.

Peggy said...

Only you, Erin, would poeticize about poop. And only you would be able to make such a crappy (hehe) thing so dang funny!

Aldea Aundy said...


Banned complain !! Complaining only causes life and mind become more severe. Enjoy the rhythm of the problems faced. No matter ga life, not a problem not learn, so enjoy it :)

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